Happiness Project Assignment

                After completing this unit, I have learned a lot about what a fulfilling life is, and how to achieve it. The “good life” is one that is full of happiness. Every aspect of life, be it work, family, friends, or hobbies, should contribute in a positive manner to ones over all cheerfulness. A flourishing life usually involves being surrounded by people you love and who love you. You know that you are living a “good life” when you wake up in the morning and you can’t wait to start the day; you can’t wait to be happy and you look forward to taking part in all of life’s activities, for they all bring you bliss. To be happy, it does not matter if you are extremely wealthy. Money does not affect ones over all happiness; however it is important that you have enough money to sustain yourself, because when you start to fall below the poverty line, sorrow is not far behind. Another aspect to living an exultant life is variety. As shown in the movie Yes Man, Carl used to say no to everything, and instead of living an exciting life full of new adventures, he stuck to his basic, daily schedule, turning down every invitation he got. Because of that, Carl was extremely unhappy, and it wasn’t until he stepped out of his comfort box and began taking on new experiences that he finally felt happy and satisfied with life. But not everyone lives a happy life. It takes some work. However, everyone, if they put enough effort in, can live a flourishing life full of happiness. For this project, I chose to look closer at a girl whose life is blessed, yet she is still not the happiest she can be.

                The girl I chose to create a happiness program for lives a fairly typical life. She is a hard working teenager, who has high goals and aspirations. The main cause for her unhappiness comes from stress and self-inflicted pressure. She puts pressure on herself to match up with her two successful sisters, her friends, and her other family members. Even though it is not intentional, she is constantly comparing herself to those around her; her envious tendencies end up causing her a lot of unhappiness. Envy is one thing that is very detrimental to one’s happiness. When you are constantly looking over the fence at what other people have, and not being happy with what you have, you are let down and filled up with sorrow. Because she has issues with comparing herself to others, she finds herself unhappy. She also inflicts pressure upon herself to level up with these people, and that causes her stress, anxiety, and therefore grief. Another cause for her stress is her goal for perfection. She spends a lot of her time doing hours and hours of school work in hopes of achieving that glorious A on her report card, like both of her sisters have in the past. However, grades are not everything, and one can be successful and happy with life even if one isn’t a straight A student. The pressure that she puts on herself to be great academically causes her insane amounts of stress, and leads to unhappiness; she stresses out leading up to, during, and after every exam. The leading cause to unhappiness and stress in life is the pressure that she puts upon herself to be perfect, like the people she is constantly comparing herself against.

                There are several things that she can do to make her life more enjoyable and less stressful. First, she needs to overcome her major problem with comparing herself to others. To do this, I have told her that instead of spending time over analyzing people and situations, she should fill up her extra time doing things that she loves, with people she loves. That way, if she is always preoccupied with different activities, she will find herself enjoying her days more and comparing herself with others less. She should follow the laughter and fun strategy for living a happy life. The strategy says that if you spend your time doing things that are fun and make you laugh, then you will in turn be happy. The logic behind it is, when you are laughing, you physically cannot experience sadness or emotional pain. So if you find activities that make you giggle, you will also find yourself “laughing away your worries”. This girl has no problem with laughing and enjoying herself, it is just the issue of finding time to enjoy herself. If she can eliminate the useless time spent over analyzing situations and comparing herself to others, then she will have time to laugh more often, and therefore she will find herself being happier.

Another thing that she needs to do before she can have a flourishing life is she needs to accept herself for who she is. There is no way that she can learn to truly love others and enjoy life before she loves herself. Mr. Rogers, a man known for his optimism and happy visage, always stressed the importance of loving and understand all people, for when you love others, that love is reciprocated. Although loving yourself may sound like a simple task to do, it is not so easy for this girl. The pressure she puts upon herself to level up with her peers and siblings is insane. She is always self-aware and focuses on her imperfections. Because she only sees herself for the flaws she has, she is saddened. She needs to find a way to be less critical about herself, and channel Mr. Roger’s optimism. For that problem, I told her that she should spend a little time everyday going over a list of things in her life that she is thankful for. When you reflect on all the things that you are thankful for, it makes you happier because you realize how lucky your life is. And after she spends enough time generating these lists, she will finally realize that she has a lot to be thankful for, and plenty of reason to love her life and herself.

Spending more time in nature and outside, I told her, will also make her happier. This past week, since the weather has been lovely, she has been outside doing homework. Usually doing homework causes her stress and unhappiness, but since she was outside, it made the process not that bad. This happiness strategy is called biophilia. It says that when you are outside and immersed in nature, you will find yourself in a calmer and happier state of mind. Nature has a powerful calming and peaceful force that truly puts the people in it in a more pleasant state of mind. Spending time outside, like going on more hikes or simply doing homework on her deck, will make her a lot happier.

Living a happy life is not easy by any means, but it can be accomplished by anyone who is willing to try. This girl on the outside seems to live a happy life, but in reality there are things that she can be doing to make her life even more pleasant. The major source of her unhappiness comes from self-inflicted pressure that she has due to her envious and over-analyzing tendencies. To become happier, I told her, she first needs to stop putting too much pressure on herself, love herself for who she is, and spend more time doing things that will truly make her happy. Examples of that include being outside and hanging with the people she loves and who love her. This girl needs to stop spending time stressing out about life, and instead, spending time enjoying it. She needs to take the same advice given to Carl in Yes Man and, “Live your life! You won’t regret it!”. For when she does that, she will find herself living a flourishing and “good” life at last.